FROM SPORTS REPORTS OF SORTS: Our NHL experts have made some predictions about this year's Stanley Cup winners and they may take some hockey fans by surprise.
Duff Duncan, Keith Canuck, and Terry Terrington predict the cup will:
-Be won by a team that has at least 12 players with heavy Canadian accents,
-Stop by an all night bar frequented by lowlifes and their shady family members about ten minutes after the championship game ends,
-Have at least one misspelling of a player's name. It won't be the fault of the NHL. It will be the fault of the player with the misspelled name and Molson beer.
-Somebody will pee in the cup. Yep, it will be the same player who misspelled his name on the side of the trophy.
-One of the winning team members will hoist the cup over his head and try to smile before he quickly realizes all of his teeth fell out of his mouth and into said cup.
-The winning team will say that Lord Stanley would have enjoyed seeing hockey's finest spit tobacco juice into the cup. There is no way of disproving that since Lord Stanley is not around to dispute this fact.
-And, finally, The Stanley Cup will have to spend the better part of the year being cleaned and martinized by a guy named Choog, who is not that Choog, but is told he looks alot like that Choog.
Until next time, we are here at this desk, with this stack of sports news, ready to bring you all the sports reports of sorts that you have sort of thought about this week.
Duff Duncan, Keith Canuck, and Terry Terrington predict the cup will:
-Be won by a team that has at least 12 players with heavy Canadian accents,
-Stop by an all night bar frequented by lowlifes and their shady family members about ten minutes after the championship game ends,
-Have at least one misspelling of a player's name. It won't be the fault of the NHL. It will be the fault of the player with the misspelled name and Molson beer.
-Somebody will pee in the cup. Yep, it will be the same player who misspelled his name on the side of the trophy.
-One of the winning team members will hoist the cup over his head and try to smile before he quickly realizes all of his teeth fell out of his mouth and into said cup.
-The winning team will say that Lord Stanley would have enjoyed seeing hockey's finest spit tobacco juice into the cup. There is no way of disproving that since Lord Stanley is not around to dispute this fact.
-And, finally, The Stanley Cup will have to spend the better part of the year being cleaned and martinized by a guy named Choog, who is not that Choog, but is told he looks alot like that Choog.
Until next time, we are here at this desk, with this stack of sports news, ready to bring you all the sports reports of sorts that you have sort of thought about this week.
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